Last night about 100 college age people came to text in their questions regarding sex. Just like last week we didn’t have time to get through all of them even after and hour and a half of discussion. I’m going to post some of the questions we didn’t get to answer along with my response to those questions this week. Here are the first three.
1.Is it a sin if I am sexually active, but I’m in a committed non-marital relationship versus just sleeping around?
Answer: Yes. While the physical, emotional, mental consequences of sleeping around may be greater than in the type of “committed” relationship described here, that does not change what God clearly says regarding sexual immorality. As Jim said this weekend sexual immorality is any sexual activity outside of the context of one man, one woman who are married. 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 puts it pretty plainly.
2. What does the Bible say about secondary virginity? Is there such a thing?
Answer: Nothing and no. That’s the most direct way to put it. What the Bible does talk about is being transformed into the image of Christ, being made into a new creation, a putting off of the old self and a putting on of the new self, being clothed in Christ’s righteousness ( Romans 12:1-2, 1 corinthians 6:11, Galatians 4:19, Ephesians 2:1-10) etc…So instead of claiming secondary virginity, which I believe is a mental mind game many use to deal with guilt, I would say claim the cross of Jesus and recognize that your sexual sin is well within the reach of the grace the cross produced. Then continue following Jesus through love and obedience in every area of your life.
3.Am I contributing to someone’s sin, If I’m working in a sex shop and selling sex toys to married and unmarried men and women?
Answer: This is a good question. The question could be raised by someone who works at a fast food joint, or serves alcohol as a waiter, waitress, bartender etc… Yet I think there is a difference. There is a difference between selling someone something that is morally neutral like a glass of wine, or a cheeseburger, or a car for that matter and them using it to sin through gluttony, getting drunk, or harming someone with or in their vehicle and selling pornography, which is not morally neutral. While there are some web sites that sell sex toys, that are designed for those who don’t want to look at pornographic images but want to enhance their sexual experiences in the context of their marriage, my suspicion is (and I could be wrong) that this sex shop also sells pornography. If that is the case I think this is different territory than the person who sells cheeseburgers because pornography is not morally neutral, its sinful in both in its production, and consumption.
Tags: sex; locked up
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